I realize that this is a flaw of mine, and I'm working on it. If they continue to be mean, create some distance. I dread being asked what I plan to do after graduation about paying them back. If you really can’t stand to see another ad again, then please consider supporting our work with a contribution to wikiHow. July 25, 2016. How to Stop Hating People: 17 Effective Ways 1) Open up your mind When your perspective is limited, you will not welcome new people into your life. If you’re in denial about why you hate the person, then you’ll never really be able to deal with your feelings. Sometimes just not talking to them for a while can help. What if I have to see the person daily and they keep doing things to upset me? So, be very careful. But continuing to feed the flames of hate, just keeps you in limbo (and in pain). If you and the person you hate are in the same social circle or hang out at a lot of the same places, try to avoid the person as much as you can until you feel calmer about the situation. That is your choice, but it's not a very healthy attitude. One of the reasons you may hate everybody is because you assume that everyone around you is only out to hurt, annoy, or bother you in some way. Side one. Assume the best about people instead of the worst. Stop creating unnecessary anxieties for yourself. Though you may never be a social butterfly, you can make a real effort to stop hating and to open yourself up to love and understanding. Say something like, "I thought we put all that behind us, but you keep bringing it up. Too many people manipulated me and betrayed my trust. If you have decided to stop it then first step is done, let me help you with the second one. (There are exceptions for those with health or childcare issues.) Develop a loving relationship with yourself. In this case, several readers have written to tell us that this article was helpful to them, earning it our reader-approved status. We know ads can be annoying, but they’re what allow us to make all of wikiHow available for free. Unlock this expert answer by supporting wikiHow, http://www.apa.org/helpcenter/recognize-anger.aspx, https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-last-best-cure/201405/15-ways-get-someone-out-your-head, https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/evolution-the-self/201501/don-t-let-your-anger-mature-bitterness, https://hbr.org/2012/01/how-to-work-with-someone-you-h, https://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/200401/forgiveness-is-good-point, https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201605/how-you-can-get-along-people-you-really-don-t, https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-angry-therapist/201701/how-not-hate-people, https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/how-be-grown/201403/how-forgive-someone-you-hate, https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/evolution-the-self/201209/how-and-how-not-stand-yourself, https://hbr.org/2014/06/managing-two-people-who-hate-each-other, consider supporting our work with a contribution to wikiHow. You know, the guy she used to eagerly slip between the sheets with. ", "I'm sorry that I've been so judgmental about your quirks. I hate myself so much and I try to do different things I love to stop hating myself but it doesn’t help. Learn to stop looking at the people around you as a nuisance or a threat and learn to embrace the good people around you and to see that they can actually improve your life if you let them. For example, they might have been harshly criticized when they were young, so now they criticize others and boast about their accomplishments, to help them more secure. This article was co-authored by Trudi Griffin, LPC, MS. Trudi Griffin is a Licensed Professional Counselor in Wisconsin specializing in Addictions and Mental Health. This can make you both outwardly and inwardly optimistic. Are you still upset? {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/b\/b1\/Stop-Hating-Step-1-Version-2.jpg\/v4-460px-Stop-Hating-Step-1-Version-2.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/b\/b1\/Stop-Hating-Step-1-Version-2.jpg\/aid681531-v4-728px-Stop-Hating-Step-1-Version-2.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":"728","bigHeight":"546","licensing":"